


5 times Clint Barton confused someone (+1 time he was confused) ON HOLD

by 18c_sprkl



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: 5 Things, BAMF Natasha Romanov, Background Relationships, Ceiling Vent Clint Barton, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Clint Barton-centric, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Jealousy, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-15
Updated: 2018-04-24
Packaged: 2019-03-31 20:01:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13982295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/18c_sprkl/pseuds/18c_sprkl
Summary: Hi! I've had this idea stuck in my head for ages - and Clint is a seriously underrated character. Plus, with infinity war looming, I am seriously not ready to let my faves go, hence this fluffy fic with a bonus ofc, because none of the marvel characters fitted what I was looking for.This is my first ao3 fic, so please be nice, but constructive criticism is welcomed.Enjoy!





	1. Natasha Romanov (A beat)

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I've had this idea stuck in my head for ages - and Clint is a seriously underrated character. Plus, with infinity war looming, I am seriously not ready to let my faves go, hence this fluffy fic with a bonus ofc, because none of the marvel characters fitted what I was looking for. 
> 
> This is my first ao3 fic, so please be nice, but constructive criticism is welcomed. 
> 
> Enjoy!

The Black Widow was an enigma SHIELD was yet to solve. She never left a trace and was the best assassin available for hire, but recently she had gotten sloppy. Erratic patterns were replaced by a sense of sentimentality, and she was getting easier to track down, leaving fingerprints, appearing in the same place many times, and fighting the agents they sent instead of fleeing.

All in all, she had Fury stumped, and wanted her gone, which was why he had put Coulson on it, who had promptly decided Hawkeye was suitable for the mission.

“No” The director growled. To his credit, Coulson didn’t bat an eyelid, despite his agent starting to snigger. “Sir, as much as you dislike Agent Barton, he’s currently our best sniper. He has an exemplary track record, and has run into the Black Widow before and still come out alive.”

“Barely.” The agent in the corner gripes. “Also, I’m offended, O Handler of Mine. I will always be your best sniper.”

Fury ignores him, mentally adding ‘whining’ to the list of reasons he dislikes Hawkeye, and fixes Coulson with a steely glare. “I’m aware of all of those things, Agent. I’m just worried that Hawkeye might do something stupid, like run off with her.”

“Not my type.” The archer doesn’t even let Coulson get a word in. “Also, why don’t I get a ‘the’ in front of my name? I want to be The Hawkeye, not just-“

“Clint.” Coulson stops him mid tirade - something his past handlers never managed to achieve - and sends him a ‘not now’ look. Clint falls silent.

“Fine.” Fury declares, surprising Clint so much he nearly falls out of the chair. “But if she’s anything but dead after this, you’ll both be scrubbing the toilets with your hair!”

Neither agents laugh, but once they’re out of earshot of the office, Coulson sighs heavily, not quite breaking his façade. “For some reason, I don’t think he was joking. Also, you owe me ten bucks. That vein was bulging from about 3 minutes.”

“God fucking dammit” Clint swears, digging in his pocket for the money, and then from down the corridor, they hear Fury. “Language, Barton!”

[]

Not 12 hours later, Clint is set up on a rooftop in Rome, sights set on the red head sipping coffee and reading a book in the sun. It’s an easy shot; just pull the trigger and his job is done. He could’ve taken this from anywhere: the roof opposite the square; the second floor window of the office block; the apartment block 2 miles away if he was feeling like a show off, or even from a window over looking the closest alleyway.

But here, here, his sniper eyes can see everything, from the children singing in the square and eating ice cream to the beads of sweat on an American's head and every colour on the pigeon next to him. This is what it means to be Clint Barton, taking the shot that nobody else can all while bantering with his handler who's famous within SHIELD for his poker face. He exhales sharply, calculating trajectory and wind speed in his head, waiting for Coulson to call it. "Do you have eyes on the target, Hawkeye?"

Clint is glad it's Coulson in his ear. His unflappable nature meant that generally, no matter what shit Clint threw at him, he could handle just about everything. “Affirmative. Clear shot, no possible complications.” A beat.  
“Copy that. Take it.”

Hawkeye breathes in, preparing to squeeze the trigger as he breathes out, when the red head starts moving for the first time in an hour, turning her head across the square, lifting her face towards the sun and – there’s a look on her face that Clint recognises immediately, a detached air about her that hides a willingness, a readiness, and now she’s looking directly at him, no doubt about it. He looks into her eyes and sees the same expression Phil saw in his years ago. I am ready. It screams, and he wants to scream, because the Black Widow is giving him permission to take her life. A beat. “Hawkeye, why haven’t you taken the shot?” 

It slips out before he can stop it, unthinking and blind in his faith that Phil will know what he means, Phil, of all people, will understand why he can’t do this, even if it means his resignation. “It’s like looking in a mirror”

There’s another beat, longer, and the Black Widow is starting to frown, wondering why she’s still alive and not bleeding out all over the pretty cobblestones. Across the square, a child starts to scream, and she turns into a blur of movement, vaulting over the table towards the men with guns standing over the civilians. Without thinking, Clint squeezes the trigger, not once, not twice, but five times. When the men tumble down like bowling pins, even she can’t hide her surprise. 

“Clint” To his surprise, Phil’s voice is steady and strong in his ear. “please tell me you’re not going to run off with the Black Widow and leave me alone with Fury.”  
Clint’s laughter carries on the wind onto the streets of Rome. “No, sir. I’m going to bring her in.”

A beat. “Well thank God. My reputation would’ve never withstood you leaving me for her.”

*  
Maybe 5 years later, when Romanoff has become Tasha, and Clint has bled in her arms 100 times over after taking bullets meant for her, she looks at him as if seeing him for the first time. “Why?” She whispers brokenly after Budapest. Clint can still barely walk and she’s still bleeding from the gash in her face. “Why did you let me live? I was right there, it was an easy shot.” Natasha isn’t a robot, and Clint and Phil have learnt to read her through minute movements and speech patterns, knowing that there isn’t always a hidden meaning behind her words, and that the ex-Russian assassin just wants to be able to trust people.

Clint thinks back to the sunny day, and how her red hair shined in the light, and the reflection of the fountain in her green eyes. “I don’t know” He says truthfully, and Natasha smiles, a genuine grin. “Neither do I”

A beat.

“Maybe I just have the preservation instincts of a mayfly.”

Natasha laughs, clear and beautiful like the first note of a new melody, and Clint smiles, because she’s finally found home.


	2. Thor Odinson  (Nicknames)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back with a second chapter!
> 
> I was really surprised at how many people read the first chapter, so I thought 'what the hell, let's write another one'. I'm sorry if there are any grammar mistakes - just let me know - I just finished writing this in a Red Bull induced haze. Thor is one of my favourite characters, but I have my own interpretation of him, so I hope you enjoy it. As before, please leave kudos if you like and constructive critiscm is welcome. 
> 
> PS: THAT INFINITY WAR TRAILER THO

“Hey Point Break” 

Since returning from Asgard and moving in with the other ‘Avengers’, as they had been dubbed, Thor had quickly realized that Sta-Tony’s, and Clint’s, nicknames were relentless. The others seemed to tolerate them, Clint going to far as to only answer to ‘Legolas’, much to May’s chagrin (the louder of the two females). Personally, Thor couldn’t see the resemblance between the two archers, but when he told Clint that, he pulled such a good ‘puppy dog expression’, as Natasha called it, he caved in. 

 

So Thor just smiles widely at Clint, who has spread himself across the sofa, and says: “Good afternoon, Shield brother. I am glad to see you awake after last nights festivities.” He allows a short pause, reveling in the look on Clint’s face. “Is it human custom to wake so late after such parties?” 

What Thor will never admit, is that he is a huge jokester. It was one of the reasons he got on with Darcy so well. On Asgard, there is rarely a chance to pull pranks without repercussions - although that didn’t stop Sif - and yet here on Midgard it was customary to prank those that you loved. So really, it hadn’t taken Thor long to start messing with his teammates. His favourite so far: ‘Traditional Asgardian Customs’ 

 

“Just me” Clint groans, reaching for the remote. “Although Stark doesn’t drink too much anymore - thanks to his soulmate - Steve and Nat have some weird intolerance to alcohol, which is sad for everyone involved, and Bruce just doesn’t drink. May is just weird and gets up early, as well as Coulson. And you, my big muscly friend,” Clint squeezes Thor’s forearm, making him chuckle. “You are just a freak of nature” 

Thor’s laugh vibrates the sofa with its heartiness, and Clint just downs as much coffee as he can, before slamming it back on the table. “Hot, hot, hot, hot hot hot -“ 

 

“You’re an idiot” a fond voice says, and Thor doesn’t need to turn his head this time to know that it belongs to Maebh, the SHIELD agent turned friend and Irish elemental. “You know not to drink Tony’s coffee freshly made”   
“On Asgard,” Thor rumbles, patting Clint on the back consolingly, “it is customary to drink all hot liquids at their full temperature, as part of a mating ritual. The man to drink as much as he can before yielding is considered the Champion.” 

 

Clint doesn’t say anything, which isn’t too surprising considering he’s trying not to cry, but May and Natasha (Thor’s not sure when she walked in) laugh. “You’re kidding, Thor. That cannot be a thing”   
“Oh, aye.” Thor stands, pushing Clint off the sofa, causing him to give an incredible stink eye that would have Loki proud. Then Thor frowns, because Loki has never been proud of anything, and he knows that Clint would want nothing to do with his adopted brother. “But that is another story. The champion of this challenge fights the champion of the rock lifting challenge for the ultimate champion title.” 

 

May laughs so hard she topples over, and a corner of Natasha’s mouth quirks up in a smile. “You blew it, Blondie” The Captain says as he enters the room, dressed in a far too small Black Sabbath t-shirt. “Now they know you’re pulling their legs”   
“I had them eating out of the palm of my hand” Thor grins. 

“Hang on” Clint pops his head out from under the sofa. “Did Captain America just call Thor ‘Blondie’?”   
Steve and Thor laugh in unison, but when there’s no response from the girls, they turn to look at them. May’s eyes are so wide they look ready to fall out of her head and even Natasha looks speechless, eyebrows raised and mouth open. “That is sinful” Maebh comments, and Natasha nods in agreement. 

 

“Steve, I’m officially banning you from wearing Tony’s clothes.” Clint blurts, and when Thor glances at him, there’s a strange expression on his face, almost akin to - Thor blinks, and it’s gone, replaced with a teasing smile. “I cannot have you wandering around practically naked.” 

“I agree with Legolas” Thor nods gravely, and Steve folds his arms, causing May to audibly gasp. “I’m just admiring, I promise!”   
“Fine.” Steve sighs. “But Tony still gets to wear mine.”   
Clint shrugs, while Thor is already thinking of another thing to trick his friends into doing. “That’s only fair.”

 

[]

 

It isn’t for another few days that Thor sees Clint, as he’s away on SHIELD business, and do that gives him plenty of time to prepare his next prank. When Clint does eventually come home, however, Thor thinks that maybe it isn’t the best time. He’s watching the news with Steve and Tony when the elevator door slides open, and a bruised and battered Clint tumbles out, supported by a dirty looking Natasha. 

 

“Oh my God” Tony says, rising to his feet, but Thor and Steve beat him there, lifting Clint off Natasha and helping him to the sofa. “What the hell happened?”   
“A rather large gun” Clint joked, and Thor relaxes slightly, because if he’s joking, then it’s not as bad as it looks. “Someone kicked off about the huge Chitauri whale thing, just not in a way SHIELD expected. We went in and handled it.” Natasha explains. 

 

“It was a fairly large gun” Clint amends, and Natasha nods.  
“Still not big enough to get you to go to medical.”   
“I’ll go to medical when I’m dead”   
“At this rate you’ll be dead before next week” Natasha fires back. 

 

Thor quickly deciphers her anger as worry, and placed a large hand on her shoulder. “Perhaps you would like to go clean yourself up, Lady Natasha.” It was a low blow, calling her ‘Lady’, but it worked every time. “Fine.” She snaps. “But if he’s bled out by the time I’m back, I’ll cut off your toes.” The elevator door slides shut behind her as Clint starts chuckling, wincing slightly. “That woman is terrifying.” 

“Yeah” Tony says, slightly breathlessly. “JARVIS, could you get Bruce down here please? I knows he’s not ‘that kind of doctor’ but he’s the only doctor Legolas likes.”   
“He’s already on his way down, sir.” JARVIS’ smooth tones reply, and for once, Thor manages not to flinch. It had taken him a while to get used to the AI in the building. 

 

“I’m fine” Clint says, a little too forcefully. “I’ve had worse.”   
“We know that you have” Thor growls, and the men look confused. “Thor, buddy, you okay?” Steve says placatingly. Thor has a lot of respect for the Captain, and that’s all it takes for him to not bite his head off. 

 

“Yes, thank you. I was merely referring to my brother’s” he spits out the last word “cruel treatment of Barton. Not many recover from that so quickly.”   
Clint pushes Tony off his blood soaked arm and stands up with some difficulty, so that he can look Thor in the eye. “Where’s this coming from, Point Break?” 

 

“If I hadn’t been so cruel and horrible to Loki, then perhaps he would not have invaded the Earth and attempted to enslave your mind! It was my mistakes that caused your suffering!”   
There’s a long pause, filled with Thor’s heavy breathing and the crackle of electricity in the air. For a second, he fears that the archer is going to run away, or worse, hurt himself, but then something strange happens. 

 

Clint lets out a bark of laughter. “You’re kidding Goldilocks. Are you pulling my leg again? Why the hell would I blame you? There was no way you were meant to know that a few cruel jokes would make Loki go crazy and mind control people.”   
All of the fire and tension that has built up in Thor suddenly goes out in one fell swoop. “You do not - blame me?” 

 

This time Clint does laugh, fully and from the stomach, so hard that he has to grip the couch to stop himself falling over. “No, Goldilocks” He says once he’s managed to regain some control over himself. “Of course I don’t” 

 

There’s a long pause, and then Bruce steps out of the lift, rather large first aid kit in hand, and Tony groans.  
“Okay, this has been fun, but a) are we not gonna talk about how awesome a nickname Goldilocks is? And b) as much as I’m enjoying this heart to heart, Legolas is still bleeding out.”


	3. Tony (Dog Tags)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah! It’s finally here - and only a few days before Infinity War. 
> 
> I’m sorry it took so long, school has been hectic and it didn’t want to write itself like the last two. I hope it’s okay, although I’ll probably come back when I’ve finished and fix it.
> 
>  
> 
> TW- Panic attacks, mentions of PTSD

Tony first notices the dog tags on a Wednesday morning, when he’s drinking coffee at some ungodly hour with Steve. Or, he’s drinking coffee, while Steve is making something that smells really good. He hopes it’s pancakes. (Spoiler - it is). 

It’s 2 in the morning, and according to his soulmate it’s time for bed, but because he hadn’t eaten, time for pancakes. So naturally Tony’s a little surprised when Maebh traipses in dressed in a Black Sabbath top that looked familiar and black shorts he was sure he’d seen Clint in, looking suspiciously awake for so early in the morning. 

She doesn’t greet either of them, but makes a beeline for the freezer, pulling out a gross quantity of Ben and Jerry’s. “I didn’t even know we had that much ice cream.” Tony says, wide eyed. “JARVIS, why do we have so much ice cream?” 

“Maebh and Mr Barton ordered it in Monday, Sir. They insisted they have it for now.” 

Behind an armful of ice cream tubs, May scowls. “I could’ve told you that, Tones. No point asking the evil AI overlord. No offence, JARVIS.” 

“None taken, miss. Would you like me to order some more in for later?” 

“Yes” May says, at the exact same time that Tony intervenes. “No! Steve, tell her she can’t have more ice cream. Stage an intervention for the good of America or something.” Steve doesn’t say anything, although Tony does hear his familiar affectionate chuckle. He pauses, sipping his coffee, then narrows his eyes when he recognises the top. “Also, why are you wearing my clothes?” 

May shrugs, placing the tubs on the counter and going over to search in a drawer for spoons, bumping Steve. “Comfy.” Is all she says, rummaging in a cupboard until Steve places a hand on her shoulder to help. Tony doesn’t see her move, or from where she pulls the knife from, but he sees the glint of metal around her neck and the blood welling on Steve’s cheek as May backs away, breathing shakily. 

For once, Tony is torn. On one side of the room is his bleeding soulmate, but he can handle a small cut, and on the other is a clearly rattled friend gripping a small pocket knife. When the knife clatters against the stone tiles, Tony moves. 

May’s eyes are unfocused and distant, staring at something over Tony’s shoulder, something that makes her teeth shatter and hands shake so fast that Tony can’t see them properly. Unflappable Maebh, the one Tony could tease for hours on end and she would still have a perfect retort, was coming apart in front of him, breaking at the seams, and he had no idea what to do. 

Clint drops down in front of him so fast Tony can barely process it, so Steve’s hands on him are a welcome distraction from witnessing the panic on someone else, and the grounding presence of his soulmate reminds him that he is still staring like May is an animal being dissected in front of him. 

It’s too quiet and confusing and Tony’s going to start coming apart if he doesn’t get some sleep, so he lets his boyfriend lead him away, leaving Clint to look after May. Later, when Steve is showering and he’s still digesting pancakes, Tony remembers how May’s hands gripped something cool and metallic around her neck. 

[] 

It’s 2 or 3 weeks later when Clint brings it up, strolling into the workshop as if he belongs there. “I don’t have your exploding arrows ready yet, Legolas.” Tony says without looking up, mostly because if he looks away, he’s going to loose a hand to the inner workings of the Iron Man suit. 

“Oh, I know.” Is all he says back, and Tony sighs. If it were anyone else, they would take that as a cue to leave, but Clint just climbs a precarious pile of books and toolboxes and sits down on top of it all. Tony pretends to resign himself to the sudden company. Secretly he doesn’t mind it, although he supposes when living with three super spies, nothing’s really a secret.

Neither man notices how much time passes until Clint ceases his mindless jabbering for a moment, and he realises that JARVIS has darkened the windows and filled the room with artificial - instead of natural - light. “Huh” Clint says. “You know, I’m not gonna explain what May’s meltdown was about, because that’s a serious breach of privacy, but I just wanna let you know it’s not gonna happen again.” 

There’s an uncomfortable pause, which Tony fills by nodding and resisting the urge to scream. Instead, he focuses harder on the task in hand; trying to connect a particularly fiddly wire to a main power circuit. Normally it wouldn’t take so much effort, but if he’s honest (which isn’t going to happen), Tony can’t remember the last time he slept in an actual bed, and only vaguely recollects falling asleep on the couch with Steve. Speaking of, his boyfriend usually would be at his side by now, pulling him away, but he was on a SHIELD mission with Natasha. 

“You know if you connect them up you’ll electrocute yourself.” Clint says suddenly, startling Tony into dropping the small instruments. He resists the temptation to shout at his teammate. He’s so tired that it takes a minute for his eyes to focus properly on the mess in front of him, and when he does, he realises that yes, Clint is right. Probably set on fire too, he notes, pushing himself away from the desktop. If goddamn Clint can see that, then it might be time to stop. 

Tony’s vision blurs when he stands, legs crumpling beneath him, and when he can see clearly again, someone’s holding him in their arms, cradling him like a baby while they carry him through the hallway. “Steve?” He asks, and the chest he’s leaning against rumbles with laughter, but not in a Thor or Steve way, in a gentler way that matches the slender hands wrapped around him. Confusion is replaced by understanding when something metallic and rectangular bumps his shoulder. 

“Not Steve” May says, and Tony’s not quick enough to hide his frown. 

“There’s been an incident up at SHIELD.” Clint says suddenly, and Tony can see a phone in his hand. “Fury’s given me orders to initiate Protocol 10: Sierra, Tango, Alfa, Romeo, Kilo.” 

Tony feels May stiffen, even as she carries him into his bedroom and lays him on his disgustingly big bed. “Got it. I’ll inform Banner and hold down the fort until Tony’s well enough.” 

Clint nods and through hazy eyes Tony sees him disappear through the doorway, breaking into a jog. “What’s going on?” He pauses. “How did Legolas know about my suit?” 

May pulls a blanket over his body, but doesn’t attempt to try and take his shirt off. The arc reactor shines brightly through the cotton fabric, illuminating the dark room and the weariness of May’s face. “Somethings going down at SHIELD, but Clint has direct orders to go on his undercover mission for the next two weeks. I’m gonna need you to show me the security you’ve got in the morning, alright?” 

Tony nods, eyes already dropping again, but his unanswered question keeps him from dropping off completely. “Clint’s meant to be dumb” he whines. “How did he know about thermodynamics or whatever?” 

Jarvis automatically switches off the light when May approaches the door, so although Tony can’t see her face, he can hear the cheeky grin in her voice. “Circus”


End file.
